The Onion's Detailed Report on the Middle-East

This hard hitting report is an important piece of journalism. Once again, the Onion suceeds, where the mainstream media falls short.

MIDDLE EAST—With the Iraq war in its fifth year, the war in Afghanistan in its sixth, and conflict between Israel and the rest of the region continuing unabated for more than half a century, intelligence sources are warning that a new wave of violence in the Middle East may soon blah blah blah, etc. etc., you know the rest.